Last night, while contemplating the abysmal Republican performance in yesterday’s elections, I had occasion to think in a new way about abortion. I live in the state of Washington, where abortion is the Holy Sacrament of the Left which runs this state. Unlike the rest of the country, where the abortion issue was at the bottom of the list of issues which people are concerned about, in Washington abortion was the #2 issue. It always amazes me that so many women value the unlimited ability to eliminate the life of an innocent human being as central to their worldview. It’s a Death Cult.
So I was thinking about pregnant women. Women who are married, and seeking to start or increase a family with their husbands, think of the entity growing within their bodies as a human being, a baby, from the moment they discover they are pregnant. In the past, this used to be called being “with child”, a definition which immediately defines the fetus as a Child from the beginning. How a woman thinks about her unborn child has no effect on the child itself-it remains a fetus, or developing person, or growing human being, regardless of the pregnant woman’s thought processes.
A woman who is not married, and not even contemplating starting a family, and becomes pregnant (willfully or not), thinks of the entity growing within her in an entirely different way. She may think of the fetus as a huge inconvenience, an unwanted thing, an impediment to her career, or something to come between her and whoever the sperm-donor is. She may think of her growing child as a huge financial burden-more of a burden than she wants or needs. And she thinks of the father of the child only as a sperm-donor, and not a father who should have a say in what happens to his offspring. How many single, pregnant women don’t even tell the father that they are pregnant? These woman think of their fetus as simply a clump of cells that is easy to get rid of, and, once gone, will not trouble her again. As in the first case of the woman who wants to get pregnant, what this single woman thinks about her fetus makes absolutely no difference in the state of the fetus itself. It remains a child, a developing human being, regardless of how the woman thinks of it.
Now, think about how a pregnant married woman thinks about her fetus if she has a miscarriage. If she knows that she is pregnant, wants the child along with her husband, but loses it through miscarriage, she is devastated. She knows that it is a child who she and her husband have lost, not just a “clump of cells.” Losing a child at any stage of pregnancy is a very emotional and difficult medical event, for both the mother and the father, and they may grieve for a long time before trying to have a child again. But what about that single woman who has an abortion? She will undergo some of the same physical changes as the woman who miscarries, and many of the same hormonal, emotional changes too. Might this be an entry point to try and convince the woman who thinks she wants an abortion, to not have it? Give her the emotional information about what will happen to her if she goes through with the abortion. Perhaps clinics could have a roster of available volunteers who have miscarried in the past, available to speak with a woman who thinks she wants an abortion. We aways urge new mothers who are having troubles with their babies to get advice and support from other mothers, including their own. How about using the resource of women who have gone through miscarriages, to empathize with the woman seeking an abortion, and help them to decide to have their babies instead of destroying them.
If there are readers out there who have miscarried, maybe you could chime in about this idea.
4 thoughts on “A new way to think about the abortion issue”
If you had an abortion, or the mother of your child had an abortion, and you need help– contact them.
They’ve been there.
PLEASE LET THEM HELP YOU. Please!
A lot of the ladies that help with the Vineyard– that helping someone who is where they were is what lets them heal. Help them by letting them help you!
They will help you.
Pregnancy loss– that’s usually more informal. And there’s more of it. Frequently, just getting up the will to say you lost a child will get someone to reach out to you– because they did, too, or because they know someone you can talk to.
…and yes, we tend to talk about “losing” a child. Like my son was sat down in a non-obvious spot, instead of like he died.
Mine was early, and I only know — “know” — he was a son, because my body reacts differently to carrying a son than a daughter, but I’ll help if I can. At least I can listen.
(Daughters, I lose 10-20 pounds in the first trimester, sometimes before I know I’m pregnant; sons I gain weight, and tend to have morning sickness.)
Thank you, and God bless you!
You, as well!
I — thank God– have not needed Rachel’s Vineyard, but I’ve been trying to tell folks that there IS help out there, since I heard about them on the radio.
They are doing great work. I expect there are a lot of thankful women and children.